Over It.

An open letter to the weather:

Dear Current Winter Weather;

In response to your latest behavioral analysis report, it has come to the attention of the residents of this particular branch of the country that you are showing signs of emotional trauma and duress.

Obviously, the best course of action we can recommend is a leave of absence, with a long rest and a reexamination of your actions as well as your motivation.

Being that you have decided to send weather typical of the mid-west and north east to us, a region known for our mild weather and gentle climes, as well as cause blizzard conditions along several hundred (at least) miles of coast line, (which is complete insanity--I mean, really? This is not the North East. Snow on the beach just doesn't happen here, let alone a blizzard.) malcontent, bordering on insanity would be our typical diagnosis.

If you do not rescind your current proposal for the week ahead, as well as have a great change in current behavior, we will have no choice to terminate you immediately.

Thank you for your time and consideration;

The Pacific North West. (And bordering land locked states)

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Dudes--this isn't cool. I have never, ever seen weather like this here--we have snow drifts. (I know that isn't a big deal in most other parts of the country....) It should be too wet, too humid here, to facilitate dry powder snow (skiing, anyone?) which can then be whipped and whirled into drifts all over the place.

The metropolis (and it's sister city) south of here is closed. Like, all roads, all businesses. Today, both those cities, as well as everything else in the area (my house, the other metropolis, and everything in between) is projected to be buried in ice, and then dumped on by snow. For the entire week. (At least. I'm afraid of the 10 day forecast.)

Some photos?



This is our back yard last night about 11pm. It's hard to see, but what you're seeing is a snow drift up against the corner of our deck.



And here it is this morning.



And again.

This doesn't seem so bad to those of you who live in places where snow is normal, I know this.

But here? It's amazing. (And shitty.)

Whatever, we're holed up and warm, we have food and blankets and heat. (For the time being, anyway. They are forecasting that the ice storm may knock out power for 'an indeterminate amount of time', especially south of here.

Whatever. What can you do but roll with it? Exactly.

Responsorial....

Alright. I have received several emails (C? Looking at you!), phone calls (Mom) and comments (Brian) informing me that our 'winter' is a joke compared to what these storm fronts are doing in the rest of the northern hemisphere. (I know this. I lived somewhere with nasty, horrible snow-laden winters. This is nothing.)

I also know that these storm fronts that are causing our community to collapse in heap of school closures, car filled ditches, falls, accidents and other calamity are then happily heading east and causing real weather problems. C told me that our storm fronts are attacking the state she lives in wholeheartedly, my mom (who lives further north) has frozen pipes and cracked windows and a car that will not start. Brian, per his comment, is expected to get 6 more inches. (Which, to those of us/you that deal/have dealt with snow on a regular basis isn't shit....if it only happens once. If you get 6 inches a day for a week you have a problem....I'm rambling.)

Anyway.....It's still snowing here. And it's dry! It's weird.

Prepare yourselves, the rest of the Northern US. It's not supposed to lay off for at least a week out here.

But I do wish that the other citizens of this fine land would get a freaking clue about how to drive in the snow. Ugh.

The White Death

It's still snowing.

Without cease.

I don't love it. I woke up this morning, it's snowing. Went to bed last night? Snowing.

And all this after I really tried to convey to Circe that this part of the country is a 'weather free zone'. Nature says: Pants on Fire.



I will have you all notice the color of the sky in this photo. (Yes, I took it though the sliding glass door in the dining room....sorry....)

This photo was taken at 9:30am. Ominous skies, that. Ugh.

So, being that it is/was cold and snowing and very cranky-making, I did what any self respecting human would. I made stew (and used up all the meat that was threatening to become freezer burned, which is good, but now the freezer is a waste land.) and hot chocolate.

And knit. And knit and knit and knit and knit and knit and knit some more.

I have knit myself into nerve damage. The way I hold my knitting needles rests on a part of my finger that seems to have a nerve close to the skin. The entire tip of that finger is essentially numb now....But I have lots more knitting to do. So...I improvised.



Medical tape. With grimy edges. Sigh. Such glamor. (The ring I'm wearing? T gave me that for my 16th birthday. Isn't that gross and hilarious?) But it works--I have worn a groove into it where the needle rests, but I can feel my finger tip again.

Photos, some other crap

Yeah. I got nothin'. Nothing really important, anyway. Lots of knitting, lots of traveling, lots of really cold weather. Oh, and snow.

That's right. It snowed. It will continue to snow. I don't love it.




Still basically looks like that outside. More ice now, less snow on the road. That's it. Sigh.

Finished another pair of socks, and have sent them off with their rightful recipient, my friend E's lady, G. She was thrilled, which surprised and delighted me. She seemed more tickled that I had invested my own time and effort to create something for her than the fact that I had given her a gift. It made me feel really good.



Went to the city last weekend to meet with the wedding DJ, (done and booked, thank you very much) and finalize the bridesmaid apparel, as well as decorate T's sister and her husband's Christmas tree and eat our body weight in Moroccan food. (it was, to say the least, amazingly delicious. There were belly dancers, and I managed to drink a beer (or two! Livin' large!) and let slip that I, too, know how to belly dance and used to do so in public, like, for money and stuff. Looong time ago. (Five or six years) No, I won't show you. No, T, I won't wear the outfit.)



Here is the beautiful A showing her little brother who is boss in front of the tree.



There is another photo in this set where T is doing the robot and I am laughing my ass off. If it weren't so blurry I might post it. It looks mostly like I'm shaking my whole body while T spanks me.

I'm running out of stuff, kids. Sorry. More soon, I promise. T is starting his 'mandatory vacation' (or, as the realists call it, '10 day minimum company wide lay off) at the end of this week, so I'm sure there will be many shenanigans. Plus we have another meeting with My Biggest Fan*, the deacon of the church, for our marriage prep.....

*Total, complete, utter sarcasm.

Stolen

My life is boring lately. I knitted for like, 9 hours yesterday. (you think I'm kidding.) God Bless Christmas....

Anyway, I stole this from Brian. (Brian, I am thinking of you and wishing you and your sons great luck today.)

Bold the items you have done, add comments as you see fit.

1. Started your own blog. This is not the first.
2. Slept under the stars. Guilty. I don't love camping, however. Like, at all.
3. Played in a band. High School band in all it's forms. (Concert, Pep, Jazz, symphonic) I rocked the bass clarinet, baby!
4. Visited Hawaii. Too much time on a plane.
5. Watched a meteor shower. Yes, but I couldn't tell you a damn thing about them. That's T's department.
6. Given more than you can afford to charity. No. Maybe that makes me a bad person.
7. Been to Disneyland. I have no desire at all to do anything involving Disney. Sounds like my personal hell.
8. Climbed a mountain. Not like, Everest or anything. (I lived pretty close to to top of a mountain at the time as well, that helped)
9. Held a praying mantis. No, I'm good, thanks.
10. Sang a solo. Just in my kitchen. I leave the singing to T. (Who is damn good and has sung multiple solos in his life)
11. Bungee jumped. Under no circumstance.
12. Visited Paris: Paris Las Vegas.
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea. I have spent a lot of time on a boat in my life.
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. Nope.
15. Adopted a child. No, but I would in a millisecond if I could. (Just not at the moment.)
16. Had food poisoning. That's a fresh hell I wish on no one.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty. Never been to New York, never seen it in person, nothing.
18. Grown your own vegetables. Not in the last few years.
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France.Nope.
20. Slept on an overnight train. More than once.
21. Had a pillow fight. Don't ask.
22. Hitch hiked. Nah.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill. Show me one person who isn't guilty of this.
24. Built a snow fort. No. And I lived in some damn snowy places too.
25. Held a lamb. Nope.
26. Gone skinny dipping. Sigh.
27. Run a Marathon. That's just funny.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice. I watched the gondolas in the Venetian in Vegas....
29. Seen a total eclipse.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset.
31. Hit a home run.
32. Been on a cruise. No way.
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person. Never been to the east coast at all.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. Someday.
35. Seen an Amish community.
36. Taught yourself a new language. I taught myself the gibberish language my peers were speaking around me all the time in the 6th grade.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied. Stressing about money is my favorite thing.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person.
39. Gone rock climbing. And I have pictures to prove it.
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David.
41. Sung karaoke. Never into the microphone.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt.
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant.
44. Visited Africa.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight.
46. Been transported in an ambulance.
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person.
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris.
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling. I can't swim. I'm serious. T can't really either.
52. Kissed in the rain.
53. Played in the mud.
54. Gone to a drive-in theater.
55. Been in a movie.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business. I watched my parents do that.....
58. Taken a martial arts class.
59. Visited Russia.
60. Served at a soup kitchen.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies.No. But I have eaten a few freaking million of these.
62. Gone whale watching. Never needed to. Seen tons and tons of whales both here and in Alaska.
63. Got flowers for no reason.
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. Don't poke me. Thanks.
65. Gone sky diving. I don't even want to think about it.
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp. I actually would like to. I think it's important that the world not forget the most atrocious and shameful moments in history lest they happen again.
67. Bounced a check. Hopefully never again.
68. Flown in a helicopter.
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy.
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.
71. Eaten Caviar.
72. Pieced a quilt.
73. Stood in Times Square.
74. Toured the Everglades.
75. Been fired from a job.
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London.
77. Broken a bone.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle. I am the worst motorcycle passenger ever. Seriously.
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person. It really is amazing.
80. Published a book. No. But sooner rather than later.
81. Visited the Vatican. I will leave that to my in laws.
82. Bought a brand new car. No!
83. Walked in Jerusalem. On the list.
84. Had your picture in the newspaper. Indeed.
85. Read the entire Bible.
86. Visited the White House.
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. Never killed. Just prepared. Oh, have I prepared. (It smells, btw.)
88. Had chickenpox. Twice. Seriously.
89. Saved someone’s life. My stepdad maintained that I saved his life once. Then he died six months later. I don't think it counts.
90. Sat on a jury.
91. Met someone famous. KD Lang, The Presidents of The United States of America, the band Train...
92. Joined a book club.
93. Lost a loved one.
94. Had a baby. Nope.
95. Seen the Alamo in person.
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake. I have never been to Utah.
97. Been involved in a law suit.
98. Owned a cell phone.
99. Been stung by a bee. And then it's off to the hospital.
100. Read an entire book in one day. I do this a lot.

Worth It

Ok, my friends, I have forced this on some of you in the past, but if I haven't....

You really, really need to read this. Really. It's on the long-ish side, but oh, so worth it. The hilarity.

It shouldn't take you more than 5ish minutes to read it.

Please, read it. And report back your feelings, I miss my comments. (Hint.)

Christmas Stress

So I suck at blogging lately.

I'm sure you are all sobbing into your pillows each night, wondering what I am doing, and how dare I be so cruel as to not update you more regularly with the random bullshit happenings in my life.

So here's a dose for you.

Went to the metropolis on Friday and stayed with T's sister A and her husband in preparation of the purchase of my wedding dress. (My wallet moans in despair at the mere mention of this.) The appointment was on Saturday, so we had all of Friday to waste.

So we wasted it by eating unholy amounts of sushi and drinking at dive bars, which is just what the doctor ordered as far as I'm concerned. (T was rather sad that he had to work and had to miss it. Granted, he treats the idea of seeing my wedding dress like seeing Medusa herself, so I am sure that he would have spent Saturday morning drinking coffee in his pajamas and watching UFC with A's husband. Again, there are worse things.)

We went to 'I Love Sushi', a restaurant that really didn't spend a ton of time in thinking of a name, being that most people who eat sushi on a regular basis love it, or at least like it well enough.

We ate. A lot. Like, a lot a lot. And it was good.

We then began our dive bar crawl, which involved rum and diets that were nearly clear (The cola made the whole mix look like watered down scotch there was so little of it) and ended in us crashing a 60th birthday party and singing karaoke. (The oldest brother in T's clan, along with his girlfriend, host karaoke. We often crash their functions and a good time is had by all.)(And A and her husband knew the birthday celebrant, so we weren't REALLY crashing it....right?)

The bar we finished at, which was more a Chinese restaurant than a bar, per se (there was a bar there....), well, when we pulled in, I thought it was a derelict gas station. That should tell you something.

The owner/bartender/dude who seemed to be in charge that night let us smoke inside (!!) and we ended the evening with a family rendition of 'Blue Christmas'.

And T's oldest brother couldn't remember my name. Which I think is far more hilarious than it should be.

Anyway, so we closed down the bar and went home and to bed, only to get up a very few short hours later to go get the dress crap taken care of.

The dress sales person helper bunny lady (who rocks, btw) told me I was one of the easiest brides she had ever worked with because my response to a lot of her questions and queries was, 'I don't care, what does everyone else think?'. It would seem that a lot of brides are not so open to the idea that they may not know what the hell is going on in regards to things like dress fittings (not being a seamstress or fashionista)....but I'm weird.

Anyway, dress has been paid for (ACK) and is currently being made (ACK) to my specifications, and will be in my clutches in April. Then I will get it fitted to my luscious body (ha!) and we're good to go.

So I have until April to make sure that the measurements that were taken (UUUGH) on Saturday are no good when the dress arrives. So there.

Stairmaster, here I come.

*******************************

Also, and I am only bringing this up to annoy T when he reads this, I have completed his Christmas shopping, and he is going to pee his pants when he sees what I got him.

Email me, and I will tell you, if you're interested.