Hoo-rah

Several things of note:

I am up to 10,000 words on Nano, placing me a mere 3 thousand words behind my target. Awesome.

T got another (!) promotion, making me the proudest wife to be in the county.

The shitty roomie is on his way out--the new, shiny, I-have-known-this-person-for-10-years-and-he-is-an-adult-thank-the-dear-sweet-lord-above roomie arrived on Monday, making me the happiest of campers. (Not only is it nice to have a home filled with mature adults, I don't see this friend all that often, so it's nice to see him.)

Mill*stone coffee brand makes a blend called 'foglifter', which not only tastes delicious, it is so ramped with caffeine that you can feel your organs vibrate after three cups. This is saying something, coming from me. (My buddy, A {the bowler} is also a bona fide coffee addict, and it gave him 'A Clockwork Orange' eyeballs as well.) It do lift the fog. (I just had three cups and it's 1am. Ah, Nano, how you make me weep.)

New roomie, (Whose name starts with A, I will have to find a new way of talking about him) he cooks! Which means that I don't have to. Let me say that again:

I DON'T HAVE TO DO ALL THE COOKING ANY MORE.

We have eaten home cooked deliciousness all week, and I only cooked half the time.

It makes my soul smile, really.

Say some prayers about new roomie and I getting great jobs next week. Tomorrow is 'trip to large wholesale store/retail conglomerate day' as well as 'resume day'. Am I the only one that likens writing a resume to having bamboo spikes pounded beneath one's fingernails? Fuck do I hate that shit.

Anyway, that's really about it.

(I now own a copy of the greatest cover song ever: Ministry covering Louis Armstrong's 'What a Wonderful World'. Let that soak in a moment. The scary part? Not half bad.) (The even more scary part? How many of you know who the hell Ministry is? Show of hands, anyone?)

Glorious

Hey, I may be the only one here that love, love, loves horror movies and shit, but....If I'm not, y'all are going to want to go download and watch, immediately if not sooner, Dead Set. It's a 5 part mini series that just aired in the UK....and it rocks. (You can get it at the link.)

Super gory, however. And violent. Not something for the kiddos. BUT! No stupid CG bullshit, just real old school special effects. We like that.

(And it takes place on the set of Big*Brother UK. All the cast members are real BB cast members. And the celebrity host? The real one. That makes it all the cooler.)

Anyway, soap box ended. (But good horror stuffs are so hard to come by....I am just always thrilled when I can see one that either makes me go 'GROSS!', or not really want to be alone. Love. It.)

Glee, and Hope

I don't have to leave the country.

I terrified the fish with my exuberance.

VOTE!!

Good Lord, people, in the name of all things holy...VOTE!! VOTE VOTE VOTE!! Stand up and be counted!

I cannot stress it enough--VOTE. Please? Thanks. VOTE.

I plan on spending all of tomorrow sitting on my ass in front of the television, either celebrating or packing for my move out of the country.

SO VOTE!!

Depression.

Yeah.

So, in a turn of weird, unexpected and not overly exciting events, I will not begin college this winter.

I am waiting for everyone I know to start yelling at me.

I am going back to work instead.

This fucking economy pisses me the motherfuck off. My sister and her seeming complete incompetence when it comes to my father's estate pisses me the motherfuck off. Why is it so fucking hard to get ahead right now? I quit my goddamn job (all those moons ago) with the understanding and hope that I would go to school.

And now I simply cannot afford it. I am not eligible for financial aid. I am not eligible for grants. I have been out of school for so long, and my grades were so bad, I am not even close to eligible for scholarships.

Instead, I get to go try and find a job in this goddamn economy (depressing in and of itself) in this fucking county where there aren't any real jobs to be had. We have one car, and the weather is beginning to turn. Commuting isn't an option either.

I shouldn't be as upset with all of this as I am. Mostly, I just don't want to hear it from everyone, what a failure I am for electing to have heat instead of an education.

I just talked to T about all of this, and now he is feeling like a failure because he feels like he can't support me/our household. It kills me to see that look on his face. To see him hate himself, when it doesn't have anything to do with him. It has to do with everything being so expensive, with his wages not going up when the prices do. We simply cannot afford the tuition right now, if we want to eat or have electricity. He has a job with the one real company in this town, in this county, with the best paying wages and the best benefits package. How are people supporting their kids, their lives, when we can't make ends meet ourselves, just the two of us? We live cheaply, save as much money as we can, and we still aren't getting ahead.

I know there are millions of people in this country alone that have it far, far worse than T and me. I know it, and it makes me feel dirty and evil and wrong to complain.

Grand Central Station

I need to work on communication in my house.

We need a large whiteboard, or pagers, or something, so that I can know for absolute certain that if I tell someone something, they will remember it.

For instance:

"Hey boys, I have plans early tomorrow morning, my friend is coming over, and then again that evening."

This somehow translates to

"Do whatever you want, I don't need the living room, ever."

Because I was supposed to (emphasis on supposed) have my friend over for breakfast this fine morning. I was supposed to get my writing done first, have some coffee.

What is actually happening is something else entirely.

The boys came home at 6am. (Which is normal and totally fine.)
They brought a friend from out of town with them. (Which is more than totally fine, I enjoy this kid.)
That friend is sleeping on my couch. (Normally, totally fine. Today, not so much.)

So I am creeping around my house, typing on my laptop in the bedroom, and silently texting my friend to see if he wants to go out to breakfast so we can actually speak to each other and not have to hide in the bedroom or garage.

See, normally, this would SO not be an issue. SO. This friend of the boys knows he is always welcome in our house, and he is. But there have been multiple, and by multiple I mean A HELL OF A LOT of instances when T and I had plans or friends over or something and the boys determined that their wants and needs were more important. I am never going to tell someone they have to sleep in the car, or need to find somewhere else to go, so we wind up with 4 people sleeping, unhappily, in my living room.

It's irritating. I'm not being very eloquent about it. I'm mostly just pissed that yet again I can't be comfortable in my own home, that I have to change my plans last minute because the boys listened to what I told them and then immediately did whatever the hell they wanted.

And now I'm off to shower.

Cranky, Tired, and Ice Skating Uphill

I cannot seem to sleep enough.

Also, I seem to be having a raging (far worse than normal) case of PMS, which is doing great things for my home life. T is so very patient with me. I am a lucky girl.

Now let me go snap at him about nothing and then sob uncontrollably for a while. It's been working the last few days, why not?

We cleaned out our closets today, which made me want to start drinking about 9 am. But it's done.

Doing NaNoWriMo, which would be a hell of a lot cooler and more productive if you could navigate their site with any real semblance of ease. I understand that the servers are under tremendous pressure, but it's not like they didn't see this shit coming.

Uhm....Other, exciting things in the works that I will post about when they come to fruition.