Hypochondria

I have become more neurotic as time goes by. As I get older, I guess. It occurred to me recently that I am terrified of getting sick. Terrified! I'm not peeing myself or anything over it, but the idea of getting really sick makes me take handfuls of vitamins, drink gallons of water and eat more yogurt than is probably legal in several states. It's worked so far.

E. Came down with the stomach flu--the kind that makes you wonder just what you did to piss off God so much. I immediatly did the math to see if I could possibly have been inflicted, and felt nausea while doing so.

(I'm fine.)

I stuck a knife in my thumb earlier this week. (by accident!) I was talking on the phone and cutting asparagus, and in went the knife. It bled pretty well, scared T and Dad, but once the bleeding stopped, I began to fantasize about all the infections I could get--Would get--from work.

I didnt get an infection. However, I did accidentally cauterize the damn thing with malt vinegar (dont do this. Really.) It went a little something like this.

*splash* "Hey, that's really not soAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Yeah, not good.

I'm wondering if its the not smoking (41 days!) that is making me have mild OCD. I read an article that says that smoking long term (Thats me!) changes your brain chemistry in such a way that even if you quit smoking--for the rest of your life, you have a much more "addictive" personality. This is why when people go to rehab, a lot of times they wont make them quit smoking, as that increases their liklihood of relapse by something along the lines of 20%. I'm serious! The rest of my life--I'm going to have a MORE addictive personality.....

But one way that can manifest itself is with OCD. I was told at work that I had this--because I will walk around and make sure the whole restaurant matches before anyone gets there, and that I bleach my bathroom and kitchen at home. Apparently, most of my coworkers (I say MOST, not ALL) are slobs to the nth degree. And admit it as such. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fucking slob too, but I do what I can to keep the communal areas of the house clean, as well as the fixtures in the kitchen and bath. The counters are fair game!

I dont know where I was really going with this. What I do know is that I really really want to run the vacuum and put some neosporin on my thumb.